Category Archives: Internet

I Got We Got That B-Roll

To anyone who ever wonders what’s the point of the Internet …

Pete Hill is a friend of mine on Facebook, and real life too. On December 6th, Pete posted a link in his Facebook status to a video on YouTube called “We Got That B-Roll”. It had already received 5000 views at the time I watched it (one week after it had been posted).

I enjoyed the video and thought it would be a great to screen for a live audience at Pirate Video Cabaret on December 17th in Toronto. So I tracked down the director in L.A. and emailed him for his approval. He confirmed with the creative team that I could screen it and sent me a high-quality version with end credits added. And bam, I had 2 more minutes of hilarious video content to deliver to the audience on the 17th.

I predicted it would hit 100,000 views by today. I just checked, it’s at 125,219. I love being mildly accurate about something.

There’s 2 lessons here :

1. The Internet eliminates geographical barriers and provides a clearer picture of a population by its trends.

2. Your friends are the people that you listen to.

Get Ripped Soon

The ad in the left column said “Get Ripped Soon”. There were before and after shots.

The guy in the after shot was indeed ripped, but he had a terribly ugly face. And not just surface ugly, ugly behind the eyes.

And I thought, hmm, not really what I aspire to.

Facilibook

Facebook has agreed to let third party advertisers eat your children without your permission. Click on “Settings” up at the top. Select “Menu”. Then select “Human Sacrifice”. Next, select the tab that reads “Children”. In the drop down box, select “No One”. Then save your changes.

Sex, Now Effort-Free!!

I received a piece of spam mail today. The subject was “How To Give a Female an Orgasm – Without Effort”.

And I thought, “Ya, it’s having to make an effort that always seems to get in the way. If I just didn’t have to do all that heavy lifting, all the roadie work, sex would be so much better.”

And if I could get this liberation from labor in the form of capsule I could ingest twenty minutes before I was planning to find myself in a sexual situation, wouldn’t the clouds just open up? For her at least.

And if I could do all this from the comfort of a reclining chair positioned in front of a television with a colostomy bag and oxygen tank nearby… I mean wow.

Passion is pointless without action

Kevin Matviw wrote a note on Facebook today in which he offered critical advice to anyone hosting or producing a comedy show. Others agreed with the substance of his note with “likes” or comments of their own.

While I truly appreciate that there are people who would prefer to judge comedy by its level of artistic quality rather than its lack of production values, there was something about this method of communication that didn’t sit well with me. To the audience to whom these criticisms are most directed (unskilled comedy producers), they could easily come across as whiny and bitchy. As I saw it, the only substance missing was real world action.

My comment on the note:

Simon Fraser at 3:31pm June 5
I invite you all to take on finding the worst of the worst within your criteria of what makes a good comedy show or producer. Introduce yourself to them. Explain to them where your passions lie. Ask them if you could work with them to hone their production skills. If they agree, you only have to guide them once and they will have learned from your guidance.

Then have a shower. And if you’re still unsatisfied, do it again with the 2nd worst of the worst.

If you have a problem, YOU have a problem. YOU should do something about it. Writing your complaints here doesn’t do anything but create a record of your complaint. SFW? The comedy shows or producers you perceive as poor quality are not gonna have a revelation reading this here if they don’t already have revelations in the real world.

If you really want to strengthen this community, then create community.