Badvice is a clinical term used by both personality trainers and emoticon advisors. It refers to a human’s feeling that his or her doctor’s prescription is poorly conceived and need not be executed. It was first coined by Dr. Jonas Voight-Schnapp in his seminal study, “Humans Are Not As Schmart As They Think They Are, Therefore Humans Are Schtupid,” published in 2468 in the Journal of Ontological Bioscience.

Dr. Voight-Schnapp based the term (and most of the study) on Patient V, who had an overwhelming fear of heights. The doctor’s prescription was that the patient “base-jump off a high bridge as soon as possible.”

However, Patient V refused this prescription and instead opted to take a vacation in New Zealand. Unfortunately, the tropospheric shuttle that was transporting Patient V encountered a low-level radiation storm and broke up over the Indian Ocean.

“If only Patient V had not sheen my preshcription as badvice,” surmised Dr. Voight-Schnapp, “he or she might have had a long und rich exshistence.”